My Thoughts On the Occupy Wall Street Movement

When I first heard about the protestors in Portland, I didn't realize it was a part of a bigger movement. All I heard was that there were protesters in Pioneer Place, and I thought, "What for?" Nothing insane had happened in the near past to inspire insurrection, at least not by my reckoning. When I asked my informer why they were protesting, she simply said, "They're protesting corporate greed." 

 I wasn't quite sure I was on board. How is protesting going to solve something like corporate greed? Even with the specific requests of the protestors, I wasn't sure if it would work--or even if it was necessary. My conservative background had me leaning towards the stop-whining-and-get-a-job side. When people complained about home loans or school loans, I could only think that it's rather stupid of someone to take on a loan that they can't afford. 

So, as you can see, I found myself starting to choose a side. But I desperately did not want to choose a side at all, because I have to say--more "sides" to pit against each other is the last thing our country needs. 

I decided to read up as much as I could--and still try to do so--on the issue. One particular BBC article pointed to several websites that have been created based on this movement--the first being We Are the 99 Percent. Here people can upload pictures of themselves holding a sign on which their story of joblessness and indebtedness, of how they've been screwed over by the government, is written. When I first read them, though I did feel for these people, I had a hard time being completely sympathetic. If you're in debt, isn't it your own fault?  I thought. I know job-hunting sucks right now, but...so what? 

Those were my thoughts. The other website I found myself sympathizing much more with: We Are the 53 Percent , a percentage referring to the amount of Americans who pay income tax. This website is a counter to the first, with similar pictures of people holding up signs--this time describing their journeys escaping debt, how hard they had to work to find jobs, and essentially that they worked hard enough to succeed. They also occasionally tell the other side to stop complaining. 

As you can surely tell from the way I'm writing this, it was much easier for me to side with the 53 Percent . They work hard, make good decisions, and are safely out of debt because of it. Right? 

Well, the article I was reading pointed something interesting out. Both sides hold fast to a very deep American ideal: Hard work should pay off. Our country started with that "pull-yourself-up-by-your-bootstraps-and-get-'er-doooone" mentality. It's one of our founding principles, and one most Americans hold near and dear to their hearts whether they consciously realize it or not: Work hard, reap benefits. Conversely, if you are lazy, we tend to believe you don't deserve a reward. 

Both websites, both sides, are proclaiming this. 

We Are the 53 Percent is full of people saying "Look--we worked hard and now we live debt free." They're saying that if you work hard enough and make wise decisions, you will get rewarded. That's how our system is set up, it's how we believe it should be, and they've seen it work first-hand. We Are the 99 Percent, on the other hand, is saying, "Look--we worked hard, but we still have to live with huge debt/joblessness/poverty/etc." They are saying that they believe hard work should be rewarded--but, because our system is broken, it hasn't worked for them. 

It was then that I realized why it was so easy for me to side with the 53 Percent. The system has worked for me. Sure, job hunting was hard, and sure I have a load of student debt, but I'm working and paying it off and it feels okay. It's not overwhelming. But let's take a step back: I have had a place to live with family, and my husband inherited a successful, albeit small, family business that's supported us. And the job I have now I would not have found were it not for the word of a very dear friend. So what at first looks like my hard work paying off turns out to be a lot of unearned help. Don't get me wrong, I work plenty hard--but I'm starting to realize that my hard work might not have been enough to get me where I am. Without all those unearned windfalls, where would I be now? Would I be able to pay off my debt or even have a place to live? With such good fortune, maybe I'm closer to the 1% than I thought. 

It's quite easy to say that those Occupying their city are merely complaining. Unfortunately, that does not take many realities into consideration. One reality is that many people are trapped in home loans not because of poor decision-making, but because at the time many banks (those same corporate banks being protested) used downright deceptive means to convince people that such-and-such home loan (ARM loans, I'm lookin' at you!) was a great idea. Read more about the mortgage crisis here. As far as student loans, many students accept loans before they've even left home for the first time. It's hard to argue that they should have known better at such a young age. Even if they did stop to consider the consequences, weren't we all convinced that upon graduation we'd receive jobs plenty good enough to pay these loans off? But now it's hard enough to get even a minimum wage job--and try paying off loans with that salary. Especially when you consider the most significant reality that I often overlooked: The rich are taxed less than the poor. This is a truth. If you don't understand how, read this or this article. How is it fair that taxes on capital gains (often the biggest source of income for the ultra-wealthy) is only 15 percent, the second lowest income tax bracket there is? Tax laws favor the rich, and this is hurting the rest of the country. To me, it doesn't make any sense. Which leads me the website that hit me the hardest:

We Are the 1%, We Stand with the 99%

Here, there are also photos of people holding up signs with their stories written on them, but these stories are different. They're stories like, "I inherited 3 million dollars that weren't taxed. I did not have to work for my education; I received more money just by being born than most people do working 60 hours a week their whole lives. This is unjust. I am the 1%, but I stand with the 99%: Tax me!" To me, it really says something if someone is demanding to be taxed more. 

To reiterate, I don't think sides pitted against each other is what our country needs. And there are certainly some people in the 99% who are just lazy and complaining; there are many who are in financial trouble because of their own poor decisions. But many are not, and the ideas that the 99% are stating seem to be right: We should work hard, but with our current system hard work does not always pay off. You don't have to agree with any certain side to see that something is wrong with this economy, and with this country.The system is broken, and change needs to happen.  Maybe that's through protesting; maybe not. What do you think? Join the discussion, whatever your thoughts are. Please let me know if you think something I'm saying is off-base. I believe we need to have that open communication--because an Us vs. Them mentality is not going to be loving, as I believe I'm called to be, or productive for any noble goal.  I want to join that discussion with what I've found that I believe. So, after a confusing and long journey of thought, I've come to decide: I do not know what percent I fall in to--I've worked hard but also been very fortunate--but I do know where I stand. I stand with the 99%, and I'm occupying this blog. 

Nicholas Aaron Madrazo

           

“Private Rogers!” roared the drill sergeant.

“Present!” Rogers stood in the back of the auditorium with several others, all lined up in uniform.

“Private Jackson!”

Another man yelled, “Present!” Most of the civilian crowd was watching each of them, twisted backwards in their seats.

“Private Michaelson!”

“Present!” I wondered how they kept their voices so steady.

“Lt. Daniels!”

“Present!” Some people were looking forward now. Some staring at their hands in their laps.

“Lt. Feeback!”

“Present!” This uniformed man stood from his seat among the civilians.

“Private Jacobs!”

“Present!” He, also, stood up from the crowd.

“Private Madrazo!”  

A young man in the very front row stood and yelled, “Present!”  I wondered where his eyes were looking. Maybe to the stage, which was empty except for a pair of combat boots, a rifle, and a helmet. Maybe at what was directly in front of him.

“Lt. Madrazo!”

Silence. The crowd, I think, was holding its collective breath.  

“Lt. Madrazo!” the drill sergeant called again. Not a murmur came in response. “Lieutenant Nicholas Madrazo!”  We all stared forward now, waiting for the answer that we knew would never come.

“Lieutenant…Nicholas…Aaron…Madrazo!” He paused between each word, louder than ever, maybe hoping it would help.

When silence still fell everywhere, he took a step. A marine to the right of the stage lifted his horn and began to play Taps. The sergeant, locking his eyes on the casket before him, slowly lifted his hand into a salute. All the men in uniform, still standing, did likewise. And his mother wept the most.  

I offer up this writing in honor of my cousin, Nicholas Aaron Madrazo. Three years ago today, he was killed in action with a roadside bomb in Afghanistan. The ceremony which I’ve recalled above occurred at his memorial service; to me, it was so painfully beautiful I had to write it down. For those who were there and share this memory, I apologize if I made any mistakes on the details. I simply wanted to record the memory in Nic’s honor, because I think what the ceremony signifies is incredibly important. Nic died doing exactly what he believed was right. He was devoted to it, completely present, until the very end. Only death could keep him from being so. It was, and is, a beautiful way to mourn and remember our Marine.

Thank you for taking the time to read this. Nic was a wonderful man, cherished and missed by many. His family has set up a foundation in his honor to support troops currently in harm’s way as well as veterans and their families. To  learn more about Nic’s story, and to find out how you can contribute, visit www.thenamesfoundation.org.

I want to close with a poem by Paul Eluard entitled “Gabriel Peri.” I read it not long after Nic’s passing, and in substituting “Nicholas” for “Peri,” I found it was almost perfect. I submit it with just such a substitution below.

A man has died who had no other shield

than his arms open wide to life.

A man has died who had no other road

than the road where rifles are hated.

A man has died who battles still

against death, against oblivion.

For all the things he wanted

we wanted too.

We want them to-day:

Happiness to be the light

within the heart within the eyes

and justice on earth.

There are words that help us to live

And they are plain words:

The word warmth, the word trust

Love, justice, and the word freedom

The word child and the word kindness

The names of certain flowers and certain fruits

The word courage and the word discover

The word brother and the word comrade

The name of certain lands and villages

The names of women and friends

Now let us add the name of Nicholas.

Nicholas has died for all that gives us life

Let's call him friend, his chest is bullet-torn,

But thanks to him we know each other better

Let's call each other friend, his hope lives on.

Semper Fi, Nic. I love you, and I praise God for the day when we will see you again. 

Food Blog! Creamy Tomato Sauce! (Gluten-free, dairy-free, and soy-free)

I have been thinking lately that I would like part of my blog to include new food conquests...whether those be creations or discoveries! (i.e. new recipes, or new restaurants) So I'm sharing this recipe, which I developed for dinner at the Walters' one night (We had lots of allergies to deal with). You should make it and let me know what you think!

Ingredients:

1 half-gallon skim lactose-free milk
1 medium log goat cheese
1 container lactose and soy free margarine (try the brand "Earth Balance")
Oatmeal flour for thickening
1 small can tomato paste
1 lb. ground turkey (optional, take out if making vegetarian)
Oregano, rosemary, basil, and garlic to taste
A pinch of salt
Half a cup of cabernet savignon
1/8 cup shaved pecorino goat cheese
a dash of red wine vinegar

1. Make the basic cream sauce by mixing milk, log of goat cheese, and margarine in a large saucepan over high heat, stirring continually. Add oatmeal flower until consistency is thick and creamy.

2. Brown the turkey, if using it.

3. On medium heat, add the remaining ingredients (including the turkey, once browned), mixing each one in before adding the next and stirring continually. (Go crazy with the spices, I think I added almost a total of a quarter cup when I did it, tasting it as I went)

4. Keep stirring until the sauce reaches desired thickness. Serve with gluten-free pasta.

And there you have it! This particular recipe makes quite a large pot, it should serve 7-8. I think it's best with penne pasta, but that's up to you. 

I hope you enjoy it. 

No One Owes Me Anything

I had an interesting thought this week. On Sunday, we were reviewing the verse in which Jesus says anyone who gets angry at their brother or sister is subject to judgement (somewhere in Matt. 5). Anyone who gets angry. That has always seemed to me to be not only a little strict--I mean, we can't really control if we get angry, can we?--but also confusing, as elsewhere in the story Jesus himself lays the smackdown on some dudes selling stuff in the temple. He's outright pissed at them--he even makes a whip right there and starts cracking it at them! Isn't this the guy who's supposed to be perfect? And who just said that whole thing about not getting angry? Where does this all reconcile?

Well, I thought to myself...perhaps there are two kinds of anger. And people have always said that to me, to excuse Jesus' behavior--"Oh, Jesus had righteous anger when he was mad." Excuse me, but am I the only person who wonders what the ---- is 'righteous' anger? when I hear someone say that? But this last Sunday I think I started to understand what it might mean. When Jesus was angry, he was angry at something being done to something other than himself. When I get angry, it's usually because something has been done to me. And I feel that I am owed something. Someone has wronged me, and I am owed an apology, or an act of kindness to make up for whatever, or something along those lines. I feel entitled, and upset until this debt I've assumed has been paid. I think that this is the kind of anger Jesus was telling us to avoid. It is inherently selfish, and we as Christians are supposed to be selfless. So true, healthy, 'righteous' anger, would occur whether the misdeed was towards us or someone else, regardless.

Now stay with me. I know this isn't really revolutionary, but it led me to a thought that's changed my perspective on life and grace significantly. The other day, I was doing what will remain an unnamed kind act for an unnamed kind person, and I thought to myself, This person probably won't even notice that I'm doing this. They probably won't even thank me. This annoyed me to the point where I started getting preemptively angry at this person and considered leaving my kind act unfinished. But then I remembered what I had thought about anger, and I thought perhaps that this perspective could apply to more of life. I noticed that most negative thoughts occur when we start to feel owed something. But if we could just operate on the basis of believing that no matter what, we are owed nothing whatsoever, nothing at all--then it would be a lot easier to love, to be humble, to be confident, and to rely on God instead of others. It would really change everything around. Jesus said to lend without expecting repayment. And in one translation of the Lord's prayer, he says "Forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors." If someone asks for your cloak, give him your shirt as well.

If this is old news to you, I apologize for boring your socks off. But it's a perspective that's letting me live life with a lot more ease and grace, and I thought I'd share it with y'all. God is great:)

Fitness.

So, I'm trying this new thing. A blog a week is my new goal. And I figure I might do better with said goal if I cut myself some slack. Not every blog is going to be very long, because I want to get in the habit of regularly writing. So, suffice it to say I no longer work at Suki's, and I am instead working at a wonderful thai restaurant. I get free thai food. It's lovely.

Today my blog is about fitness. I really want to be the type of person who is super in shape, and I always make these grandiose fitness plans which involve daily workouts and diet plans, long-term goals, calorie counting and timing and improving. I'm a planner, I'm a schemer, I'm an obsessive day-dreamer! (excuse the rhyme, please.) But these grandiose plans almost always fail. I will stick with it passionately for a week, maybe two--maybe a month if I'm lucky--and then some life situation will give me the perfect excuse to stop. The last excuse was a sprained ankle. I know, it's a pretty good excuse not to work out. But still. Today I did my first yoga workout in over a month, and I had to take it really slow, because some angles just aren't quite jiving yet with Mr. Ankle-of-the-sprain-and-contusion (still don't know what 'contusion' means). I had to really, really, REALLY listen to my body in order to work out without injuring myself yet again. And I found that this was incredibly helpful. What if, instead of making long-term plans and schedules and calorie counters, I just listened to my body on a day-to-day basis, and did what I, with my limited knowledge, knew to be best for it on any given day? When I do get a workout in, I feel great afterwards. When I do eat healthily, I feel great afterwards. If I focused on each individual day--living in the present instead of being trapped in a never-ending and oft-ambiguous future--then my long term goals will, most likely, sort of work themselves out. But if I focus on making plans and continually failing at them, I will just be a person who fails all the time. And that's no fun. Nor does it really get the point of what healthy living is supposed to be about. It's supposed to be about health (go figure).

So, my new goal (besides blogging once a week) is healthy living. I'm going to take it one day at a time, and I'm going to listen to my body. Because I'm finding more and more that my body knows generally what it needs...it's me that tends to get in the way.

It's time.

I couldn't sleep last night. I felt too sick. So instead, I sat in the living room and looked through my friends' blogs. I was astounded and inspired by the depth of the creativity of their lives and delighted by their posts, and thought perhaps I'd give it a go (I've been meaning to jump on this bandwagon for some time and now). And to begin, in the way-too-early morning hours of Saturday, I give you the poem this blog's title references, by e.e. cummings--one of my absolute favorite writers.

here's to opening and upward, to leaf and to sap
and to your(in my arms flowering so new)
self whose eyes smell of the sound of rain

and here's to silent certainly mountains;and to
a disappearing poet of always,snow
and to morning;and to morning's beautiful friend
twilight(and a first dream called ocean)and

let must or if be damned with whomever's afraid
down with ought with because with every brain
which thinks it thinks,nor dares to feel(but up
with joy;and up with laughing and drunkenness)

here's to one undiscoverable guess
of whose mad skill each world of blood is made
(whose fatal songs are moving in the moon